Lone Wolf McQuade (1983)

In the deserts of Texas near El Paso, a band of thieves drive a herd of horses into a corral.  Nearby, several state police officers prepare to arrest the rustlers.  It goes badly when the rustlers outmaneuver the police and quickly surround them.  Before the lead rustler can kill the police, Ranger J.J. McQuade (Chuck Norris) entered the fray.  In short order, he dispatched the rustlers and rescued the police officers.  One officer, Arcadio Ramos (Robert Beltran), is particularly grateful.  Upon returning to the office in El Paso, his captain (R.G. Armstrong) upbraided him for his slovenly appearance and Lone Wolf antics.  He was assigned a partner, none other than Arcadio "Kayo" Ramos.

Happenstance at a horse racetrack led to a meeting with Lola Richardson (Barbara Carrera) and her business partner, Rawley Wilkes (David Carradine).  Wilkes was a former Karate champion and McQuade was widely known for his hand-to-hand prowess.  Though tempers flared and both displayed their martial arts skills, Lola prevented them from fighting one another; that must wait for the finale.  It was now clear that Wilkes is the bad guy and Lola the love interest.

The movie plays like a Spaghetti Western and has a soundtrack that feels like it came from a Sergio Leone film.  There are several characters who follow standard tropes.  Dakota (LQ Jones) is the old veteran who is a reliable ally and doomed to die.  Kayo is the greenhorn youth who follows the hero and matures into a hero himself.  Snow (William Sanderson) is the sniveling snitch who reveals the plans of the villain and provides for some initial action in the investigation.  Sally is McQuade's daughter who is repeatedly entangled in the story and needs rescuing.  Of course, there are training montages and travel montages, accompanied by a powerful musical score.

The same year this appeared in theaters, Barbara Carrera was also opposite Sean Connery in Never Say Never Again.  In that, she was an over-the-top femme fatale.  In both movies, she dies.  Tough year for her characters but a high point in her career.

As David Carradine was best remembered for his role as Kwai Chang Caine in Kung Fu, there was much excitement over his match with Karate World Champion Norris.  Norris commented that Carradine's martial arts was about as good as Norris's acting.  Nice.

Great popcorn fun and recommended.

Damnation Alley

Hell Tanner rode his Harley toward the Mexican border, but there was soon police pursuit.  The Harley was fast, but the roadblock ahead stopped him.  The police handled him with kid gloves, needing him intact and healthy.  Returning to LA in a bizarre storm that saw rocks plunging from the sky, they arrived in time to take cover.  Denton was disappointed.  Tanner had agreed to drive to Boston in exchange for being released from prison.

It is the post-apocalypse, and the world is drastically changed.  The skies are purple or black with wild weather that prevents flight and most radio communication.  There are only pockets of humanity remaining, notably Los Angeles and Boston.  However, it is almost impossible to travel from one to the other.  The irradiated middle has come to be called Damnation Alley.  A man from Boston recently made that trip and then died from radiation poisoning.  Boston is suffering a plague and needs a serum that LA has.

Tanner drives one of three cars headed to Boston.  Car is a misnomer.  It is more like a tank with missile racks, flamethrowers, machine guns, and heavy armor plating.  The vehicles set out with a planned first stop in Salt Lake City.  They are assailed by lines of tornadoes, huge bats, snakes that are gargantuan, volcanos spewing radioactivity, near impenetrable hedges, and bandits.  On top of that, Denton gave orders to burn Tanner if he tried to run away again.

The book is very different from the movie.  Where the movie has Denton and Tanner traveling to Albany, NY with some notion of joining a surviving community, this has Tanner on a mission of mercy.  Where the book Tanner is a criminal on a journey of redemption, movie Tanner is just some guy who happened to survive the apocalypse and rides a motorcycle.

Several chapters of the book detail the deteriorating situation in Boston as the plague wipes out the population.  Each chapter follows someone else, giving it no connection.  Here is the story of how this character died.  Here is a preacher offering a sermon while a bell in the background rings with each death.  Who would set up such a bell?  When Tanner finally gets there, he meets none of the characters detailed in these Boston chapters.  Annoying.

The bike gangs were also an oddity.  Tanner encountered a bike gang, which operates as road bandits like in Mad Max, but that doesn't make much sense.  With the lethal weather, motorcycles look to be the worst road option.  During an encounter with a bike gang, Tanner absolutely mauled them with missiles, machine guns, flamethrowers, and grenades.  Despite 90% casualties, the bikers kept coming!  Really?  Yes, at that point, the willing suspension of disbelief snapped for me.

I was reminded of scenes from Steven King's The Talisman and The Black Tower series.  His alternate universe also had characters traversing an irradiated wasteland between California and New England.  Was this book an inspiration for him?

Just okay.

Good Guys Wear Black (1978)

It is 1973 and the Paris Peace Talks are underway between the United States and Vietnam.  The Vietnamese legation has requested that lead negotiator, Conrad Morgan (James Franciscus), approve the death of CIA operatives currently in captivity.  Instead, he had a meeting with CIA Agent Murray Saunders (Lloyd Haynes) and suggested a rescue operation in the next 48 hours.

In Vietnam, Major John T Booker (Chuck Norris) and his elite commando squad known as the Black Tigers climb into a Huey.  The team arrived at the site and quickly infiltrated.  No sooner had they determined that no POWs were present than Viet Kong attacked.  Not only were many of the Black Tigers killed, but the pickup helicopters never arrived.  Abandoned, the remaining Black Tigers had to trek through the jungles to escape.

In 1978, Margaret (Anne Archer) approached Booker and asked him about that last mission.  Of course, it was classified yet she somehow knew more about it than he did.  Moreover, Agent Saunders contacted Booker and revealed that someone is killing the surviving Black Tigers.  With the mysterious Margaret at his side, Booker set out to warn the remaining Tigers and uncover whoever was killing them.

This was the first Chuck Norris film I saw.  Of course, it was absolutely awesome; I was 11.  Watching it today, it is still a lot of fun, but it is short on martial arts.  After this film, I was a fan of his and saw a string of his movies over the next several years.  Lone Wolf McQuade (1983) was by far my favorite Chuck Norris film.  Walker, Texas Ranger was an outgrowth of that movie.  I was a consistent watcher of that show for the first couple seasons.  His last noteworthy movie appearance was in The Expendables 2 (2012) where he played a legendary mercenary, Booker the Lone Wolf.  That was one of the all-time great cameos. 

Chuck Norris died this morning at the age of 86.  RIP

Fackham Hall (2025)

It is 1931 and Humphrey Davenport (Damien Lewis) has a problem.  All his sons - John, Paul, George, and Ringo - died in various tragic accidents, leaving no direct heir to the family estate, Fackham Hall.  His nephew, Archibald Davenport (Tom Felton), will inherit, leaving his wife and two daughters homeless. He will resolve this quandary by having his younger daughter, Poppy (Emma Laird), marry Archibald.  Meanwhile, wily Eric Noone (Ben Radcliffe) is something of an Artful Dodger in London.  He has grown up in an orphanage, where he still resides.  Upon returning from his antics in the city, a lawyer offered him the princely sum of one pound to deliver a letter to Lord Davenport at Fackham Hall.  En route, he ran into - literally - Rose Davenport (Thomasin McKenzie), Poppy's elder sister and presumed spinster.  Meet cute, followed by slapstick comedy.  Upon arriving at Fackham Hall, Eric is mistaken for a job applicant, which he accepts, and completely forgets the letter he was to deliver.  I'm sure it was nothing important.

This is Downton Abbey as slapstick, goofball comedy.  One of the wedding guests is none other than JRR Tolkien "the Writer!" who finds plenty of inspiration for his writing.  Jimmy Carr plays the town vicar who must have forgotten all the punctuation in his sermons: "You may kiss the choir boys...  You may kiss.  The choir boys will now sing."  The Bechdel sisters who do nothing but talk about men and a desire to marry was a funny gag.  Of particular note, I did not recognize Draco Malfoy (Tom Felton); he looks quite different and Archibald is entirely unlike Draco.  At one point, it is mentioned that Archibald's older brother, Nathaniel, was presumed killed in the Great War; a flashback shows a grinning toddler in a British uniform standing in the trenches.  Yes, they were so young in the war.

Silly popcorn fun.  Recommended.

Cesar Chavez

Cesar Chavez was a labor organizer for farm workers who morphed into a civil rights leader for Chicanos.  He died in 1993.  As a union leader and civil rights activist, he was held in high esteem among Democrats.  Unsurprisingly, over the last 33 years, many streets, parks, schools, and libraries have been named in his honor.  His birthday, March 31st, is a holiday in California, Denver (CO), and Texas.  Now, more than 30 years after his death, it has suddenly been revealed that he sexually abused young women and girls.  One of his prime allies during his life - Dolores Huerta - has stated that she was raped by him 60 years ago.

No sooner has this been announced than marches and holidays in his honor are canceled and talk runs to changing the names of streets, parks, schools, etc.  The speed at which he went from hero to monster is breathtaking.  It is as if everyone knew all along and, now that it is out in the open, honors must be stripped.  There is no one on the other side arguing on his behalf.  Well, he has been dead for 30 years.  Why now?  Dolores is 96 years old and never thought to say anything in the last 33 years?

One reason why Chavez's fall from grace is unopposed is because it is the left that is tearing him down.  He was never a hero to Republicans or the right.  The Democrats are tearing down one of their heroes and the Republicans will just shrug.  Again, why now?

Cesar Chavez was adamantly opposed to illegal immigration.  Illegal immigrants were a thorn in the side of his labor efforts.  Farms were only too eager to hire low-wage illegals rather than unionized Americans.  In those days, it was possible to be anti-immigration and a Democrat.  That combination is no longer valid.  Chavez held views that are antithetical to the modern Democratic Party and some on the right have brought up Chavez to argue against illegal immigration.  That is surely vexing.

Next year will be Cesar Chavez's 100th birthday.  Would it be a day to denounce illegal immigration?  Better to take that birthday off the calendar than risk having a famous Hispanic Democrat as a symbol for the opposition.  Yes, it was time to cancel Chavez.

My Confession: The Recollections of a Rogue

Samuel Chamberlain was a boy from Boston with a grand sense of adventure.  He viewed himself as a romantic hero right out of the pages of a novel.  He wooed the ladies, clobbered the bullies, and traveled to his next adventure.  Is his autobiography just so much nonsense and self-promotion?  Oddly, a lot of it proved to be true.

Sam was an artistic lad whose father died when Sam was 14.  His wild streak began shortly thereafter.  Being more trouble than not, he went west to live with his uncle in Illinois.  Before long, he was fighting with his cousin, which caused his uncle to come at him with an axe!  Sam fled to Louisianna, where he became an accountant.  An affair with another man's wife sent him flying back to Illinois.  He had hardly arrived when there was a call for volunteers to go to war in Mexico.  Though only 16 years-old, Sam joined immediately.  He traveled to Texas with an Illinois Volunteer Regiment, but he didn't get along well with the command structure.  In San Antonio, he joined the Dragoons and found himself marching with General Wool to Monclova.  Being something of a hellion (his horse's name was Lucifer!), he found himself in several scrapes, sometimes with other troops, sometimes with Mexican guerrillas, and frequently on account of senioritas.

In December 1846, General Wool marched to support General Taylor at Saltillo.  There was a rumor that a grand army was marching north.  The army arrived in February and General Santa Anna attacked.  Samuel Chamberlain joined his first battle, the most epic one of the war: The Battle of Buena Vista.  The Dragoons didn't see a lot of action, but they were posted as sentinels during the breaks.  As action began on the 21st, expanded on the 22nd, and concluded on the 23rd, there was a need for lookouts during the nights.  Thus, Sam was posted between the two armies to be aware of night attacks.  Needless to say, he didn't get a lot of sleep.  It is a very different view of the battle where he spent much of it idle.

For the remainder of the war, he fought guerrillas and wooed the ladies.  When the war ended, he stayed in the service to head to California.  Halfway through the march, he deserted and joined a notorious band of scalp hunters.  Scalp hunters killed Apache and sold the scalps to Mexican authorities; it was a method of curbing the depredations that the Apache committed against the Mexicans.  Sam's tale of adventure ends in the California deserts between Yuma and the Salton Sea.

Like a good James Bond movie, Chamberlain had a new love interest in each adventure.  There was his true love in Boston, the woman met on the coach heading to Illinois, the girls at an all-girl school in Illinois, the married woman in Louisianna, and on and on.  Each is more beautiful than the last, but dreams of happily-ever-after are always foiled by circumstances.  Though the autobiography is built on actual incidents, his love life is almost certainly wishful thinking.

Chamberlain went on to become a general in the Civil War and lived until 1908.  Of note, his book and the many sketches and watercolors that accompanied it, was not published until 1956.  Doubtless, this book was an inspiration for George MacDonald Frazer's Flashman Papers.

Here is a great read with plenty of action, adventure, and romance.  Highly recommended.

Charley Varrick (1973)

A yellow car with an older man and a younger woman pulled up to the bank.  It has hardly stopped than a cop arrived and announced that it was a no parking zone.  The gray-haired man declared that he had a broken ankle.  The officer nodded and let it slide.  The old man went into the bank and, no sooner did the bank manager come to look at the check than the old man drew a gun.  Two other patrons - wearing masks - also drew guns.  Outside, the cop returned and the woman shot him.  A gunbattle erupted both inside and outside the bank.  Only two of the three robbers got out of the bank and the getaway driver rammed an arriving cop car off the road and floored it as they left town.

Charley Varrick (Walter Matthau) pulled off his old man disguise and Harman Sullivan (Andrew Robinson) removed his mask.  They had hardly arrived at the secondary escape car when Nadine (Jacqueline Scott) died from a bullet wound.  She really was Charley's wife.  The remaining robbers drove away in a van, arriving at Charley's mobile home.  When they counted the money, they knew something was wrong.  They had expected no more than $30,000; they had three-quarters of a million!  While Harman was elated, Charley knew that it must be mafia money and that they were dead men.

Maynard Boyle (John Vernon) received the call from the bank manager.  Unless he recovered that money, he was a dead man.  He knew just who to put on the case: Molly.  Molly (Joe Don Baker) was a man who could not be stopped.  He made his way to the little bank in New Mexico and began to track down the robbers.

How could Charley get away with the money while also guaranteeing that the mafia wouldn't forever be a threat?  He'd need to stay ahead of Molly, keep Harman from exposing them, and convince everyone that he was a dead man.

The story is terrific, but Walter Matthau is too likable to be as coldblooded as Charley.  He is over his wife's death before the day is out.  Once we learn about her background, it looks out of character for her to start shooting cops with wild abandon.  Wasn't this their first bank robbery?  Joe Don Baker is great as a grinning hitman, a villain who easily terrifies by his mere size and presence.

Recommended.