Return to the Batcave (2003)

While watching a rerun of his old TV series, Adam West hears the doorbell.  When he answers the door, no one is there but an invitation has been slipped under his door.  It is for tonight!  Calling upon Alfred - "My name is Jerry, sir" - to make arrangements, he is soon on his way to a charity auction.  To his surprise, his old chum Burt Ward also received an invitation.  Among the items available for auction is the original Batmobile!  Adam announces that he still has the key, proudly displaying it; he had taken it as a souvenir.  The lights go out and the Batmobile is stolen by some dastardly villain who took Adam's key!  No need to call the police.  Adam and Burt are on the case.

 

The campy present is spliced with events that happened during the filming of the show some 35 years earlier.  Adam is convinced that the car thief has returned from their past and they must recall that past to expose him or her.  In 1966, Adam West (Jack Brewer) is enchanted by the quirky comedy in the Batman script.  Despite his agent's misgivings, he wants the part.  He beats out Lyle Waggoner (who eventually starred as Steve Trevor in the 70s version of Wonder Woman) for the part.  Bert Gervis Jr. (Jason Marsden) won the part of Robin; he changed his name to Burt Ward almost immediately.  Marsden is outstanding as young Burt, outshining the actual Burt Ward of the present.  The things that Burt endured for the part serve as comic fodder but are true!  There is a scene with Cesar Romero refusing to shave his mustache for the role of the Joker.  Burgess Meredith doesn't like smoking for the role of the Penguin as it makes him cough, leading to his peculiar Penguin squawk.  Mostly, the scenes from the past are just fun background about the series, exploring the impact on the actors lives with the rise and fall of the show.

 

Of course, there are plenty of guest stars.  Lyle Waggoner plays the narrator, Lee Meriwether (one of the three actresses to play Catwoman) appears as a waitress, and Julie Newmar (the original Catwoman) has a part as a bar owner.  Frank Gorshin (the Riddler) also has a role.  Ah, look at all this nostalgia.

 

That Adam and Burt play themselves as would-be sleuths is often awkward.  It is particularly campy when they get into a fist fight (Adam was 74 at the time).  Unlike their alter-egos, Adam and Burt prove pretty clueless.  Still, it is a fun movie that will entertain any fan of the series.  Thumbs up!

The LEGO Batman Movie

It opens with a black screen, because all important movies start with a black screen.  Batman (Will Arnett) offers such narration through the opening logos before the movie gets rolling.  The Joker (Zach Galifianakis) has assembled virtually every Batman villain - even Condiment Man! - for his latest scheme to take over Gotham.  When Batman arrives on scene, he embarrasses the score or more of villains with humorous ease but the Joker manages to escape.  Celebrated as the hero of the city and the toast of the town, Batman returns to his vast - really vast - Bat Cave and Wayne Mansion where he is alone.  So very alone.

 

Though bursting at the seams with action, the movie has no shortage of plot and character development.  The central hate affair between Batman and Joker is just awesome.  After 78 years of conflict, Batman has still not said, "I hate you."  Worse, he won't admit that Joker is his greatest enemy.  It is a weird idea but is brilliantly done.  But there is more!  Bruce Wayne unintentionally adopted an orphan, none other than Dick Grayson/Robin (Michael Cera).  Robin suffers hero worship throughout the movie even when Batman is clearly treating him badly.  This father-son dynamic also shows with Batman and Alfred (Ralph Fiennes).  But there is more still!  The solitary Batman is infatuated with Barbara Gordon (Rosario Dawson), who is a graduate of Harvard for Police.  She plans to fight crime with a powerpoint presentation of four spreadsheets.  There are constant references to the vast history of Batman, including a clip from the Adam West era!

 

LEGO Batman is much better than Batfleck.  Definitely see this movie.  Lots of fun!

 

Suicide Squad

The movie opens with our anti-heroes in a secret prison somewhere in the swamps of Louisiana.  There is Deadshot (Will Smith), an assassin with uncanny accuracy.  Next there is Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie), a former prison psychiatrist who fell in love with a patient.  The patient was the Joker (Jared Leto).  Then we have Killer Croc, a fellow who looks to be half crocodile and half human.  For inexplicable reasons, his cell in under a sewer grate and whole animal carcasses are tossed down for meal time.  Uh huh.  Lastly, we see Diablo, a heavily tattooed gangbanger who happens to be a human flamethrower.

In Washington DC, Amanda Waller (Viola Davis) has a meeting at the Pentagon.  One attendee asks what they would have done if Superman had ripped the roof off the White House and grabbed the president.  She wants to make use of these super villains.  Of course, never addressed is the fact that her team of super villains would have been no match for Superman but let's not discuss that.  To demonstrate her point, she calls for Enchantress (Cara Delevingne).  The Enchantress retrieves top secret material from Iran in the blink of an eye.  Of note, Enchantress is not a willing pawn for Waller, who keeps her leashed by having her heart in briefcase.  No sooner is her idea approved than Enchantress goes rogue and attempts to destroy the world.  Who can save us now?

The Suicide Squad is activated and additional members arrive as they don their combat gear.  There is Captain Boomerang (Jai Courtney) and Slipknot.  Rick Flag (Joel Kennaman) of Special Forces will command the team with the aid of Katana (Karen Fukuhara) and a contingent of Navy Seals.  The mission is to rescue a VIP from the area where Enchantress is active but not to engage Enchantress.  Go!  Where are Batman (Ben Affleck) and Flash, both of whom appeared in flashbacks in this movie.

Do these villains add value to the Seal Team?  Deadshot makes sense.  The guy is murderous with a gun and has uncanny accuracy.  Yes, he is an asset.  Diablo shoots fire.  He is a walking flamethrower!  Huge asset.  Killer Croc is inhumanly strong, has natural armor, and swims like a fish.  Could be useful.  Slipknot is a skilled climber with a variety of tools to allow him to scale anything very quickly.  Potentially useful in a cityscape.  Captain Boomerang is a burglar who throws boomerangs.  Any super powers?  Nope.  Oh, but he had a boomerang with a camera that served as a drone.  The special forces didn't have an actual drone to do that?  You know, you can buy drones at Walmart these days?  Let's move on to Katana.  Skilled martial artist who specializes in using a soul-sucking katana.  Could be useful in close combat but I don't see her as more useful than a Navy Seal.  Harley Quinn is a mental case who is, for unclear reasons, unusually skilled in close combat (psychiatry training is more strenuous than I thought).  Her favored weapon is a baseball bat but she also has a pistol.  More trouble than she's worth.

The movie is just too cartoony.  Joker was particularly bad.  In the Tim Burton era, we knew that Gotham was in an alternate universe with gothic architecture and perpetual darkness.  It was a place where a villain might have a bunch of machinegun wielding clowns as members of his gang.  His was a dark version of the 60s TV show.  Chris Nolan's universe sought to be closer to reality, allowing greater verisimilitude with somewhat more realistic action and villains.  In Dark Knight, Joker's goons might wear a clown mask but a Panda Suit would be out of the question!  Suicide Squad mixes the two styles, giving a setting closer to Nolan's but characters that would fit better into Burton's.  That doesn't work.

 

Jared Leto is the wrong actor for the Joker.  He has the face of a 17 year-old.  He reminds me of David Cassidy from the Partridge Family.  He is only menacing because the script says so.  Leto does the crazy but not the threatening.  Where Jack Nicholson and Cesar Romero were presentable and Heath Ledger viewed grooming as optional, Jared Leto is the metrosexual Joker.  Maybe his best work was left on the cutting room floor.

 

Now for the utter stupidity.  June Moone is supposedly an archeologist but when she finds an ancient artifact, she immediately snaps off the head and unleashes the evil spirit contained within.  Maybe we could have had it break accidentally rather than through vandalism.  Deadshot has a gun bracelet on his arm which he used at one point to make an impossible shot.  It is a stupid weapon that should be useless beyond a dozen yards.  Once the VIP is recovered, the pickup helicopter flies into the path of the big baddie rather than directly away.  Sigh.  Waller slaughters her staff.  Well, that shows how nasty she is.  Murder charges, anyone?  No?  Enchantress can teleport to Iran and back in an instant and pops in and out so fast that she nearly trounces the Suicide Squad single-handedly.  Why didn't she just grab the briefcase with her heart and thus end Waller's influence over her?  The fact that Enchantress went rogue demonstrates that Waller is incompetent.  She thought she could manage Enchantress and failed miserably, causing all the trouble that followed in the movie.  She should be tossed into a cell between Deadshot and Harley Quinn at the secret prison.

 

It has its moments but rarely rises above mediocre.  There is a lot of good material and interesting characters here but this was the wrong story for them.  Maybe Suicide Squad 2 will turn this around.

Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice

Batman (Ben Affleck) is the mover and shaker of this movie.  It turns out that he was in Metropolis on the day that Superman (Henry Cavill) tangled with General Zod (cf. Man of Steel) and witnessed the vast destruction.  Later, he argues to Alfred (Jeremy Irons) that Superman is too powerful to trust and that he should be treated as a villain.  To that end, he prepares for the battle.  However, Lex Luthor (Jesse Eisenberg) also has grand plans.  He has gained access to the Kryptonian ship and General Zod's corpse (a very undemanding return role for Michael Shannon); Lex has grand plans.

 

The movie spends a lot of time being over-serious.  It is as if the director is unaware that his source material is a COMIC book.  There should be some light-hearted scenes.  Nope.  It is one long serious slog.  The only point of light was Wonder Woman (Gal Gadot).  Yes, her complete lack of backstory and joy in battle made her a breath of fresh air compared to the grim warriors of Superman and Batman.

 

For me, Christopher Reeve was Superman.  He took Clark Kent in a very different direction of George Reeves.  His Clark was something of a stuttering oaf whereas his Superman was a cheerful hero with a ready quip to make light of danger.  This wide gap in personalities made the silly glasses disguise more palatable.  Whereas Cavill poses as god figure who lingers on the scene for some adulation by the peasants, Reeves was a happy savior with a ready mood-lightening quip.  "Flying is the safest way to travel," he told Lois after rescuing her from a helicopter crash.  Henry Cavill's Clark is no different from his Superman; grim and serious.  Batman already has the grim and serious covered.

 

Yes, Superman dies.  Mostly.  I was really annoyed that the movie ended by essentially announcing Superman's resurrection.  Let's just undermine the emotional impact of his death.  In Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, Spock died.  His body was shot into space and that looked to be the end of Nimoy in the role of Spock.  Or, more recently, there is Jon Snow from Game of Thrones.  Yes, there is a priestess who may be able to raise him from the dead but such is left to be determined in the next season.  Heck, Jon Snow may REALLY be dead and out of the show.  I don't know and that makes it really cool.  With Superman, there is no doubt that he is alive and will appear in the Justice League movie.

 

Affleck's Batman was overburdened with dreams and visions.  His nightmares should have been cut from the film.  The elaborate post-apocalyptic dream sequence of Batman's troops battling Superman's minions was too much.  Okay, I GET IT ALREADY!  Yes, Batman distrusts Superman.  Quit hammering me over the head with that message.  Then there was the bizarre dream in which some bat monster bursts out of his father's tomb.  Why?  And then the Flash appears via time travel to offer a warning.  Can we focus on today's story and leave Justice League stuff for those movies.  If we must hint at them, hint!  Subtly.  SUBTLY!!!

 

Lex Luthor was a criminal genius but also a manic madman.  Yes, as is often the case with most of the roles Jesse Eisenberg plays, the character is jacked up on Mountain Dew or some other caffeine-rich substance.  He might even be using amphetamines.  Hetalksveryfastanddoesnotpauseforbreath.  The man must have a second job as an auctioneer.  However, I liked him.  He made for a fine and dandy bad guy.  Also, his manic act offered some much needed levity.

 

I liked it more than I expected I would.  I had heard a lot of negative reviews which may have inoculated me from having high expectations.  There is a good story here.  More stuff needed to end up on the DVD deleted scenes.  Too much of the tone reminded me of a soap opera.  Even the happy scenes are overwhelmed by this feeling of dread.  This movie needed Heath Ledger to show up and ask, "Why so serious?"